I told him I had my daily dose of vitamin c so i wouldn't blow him
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
I told you you to bring something to share....you brought tequila and a condom
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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