There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
You texted me the words "butt stuff" 53 times in a four hour period last night.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
