me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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