i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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