this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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