So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
