the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
