it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize