There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
i lost my phone in the process of getting a condom out of my hair
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I'm way too sober and people are way too heterosexual
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Randomize
