Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
The cop looked me right in the eye and apologized for cock blocking me.
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
You left your pants here again. 4th time in a row. How can you walk home without pants?
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
