That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
There is a moment when you wake up with a butt plug in when you question your choices in life.
There is also a moment when you wake up in a kiddie pool of jello cubes where you question what the fuck you did last night. Are you still in the attic or did you go home.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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