this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
It could have went better. They kicked us out of the casino and I drunkenly whipped her across the face with a fishing pole. Long story.
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
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