You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
