Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Talk all the shit you want but I slept in a oversized monster truck tire last night.
Randomize
