the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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