Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
I love it. Like, more than my penis at the moment.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
Randomize
