Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Oh shit. I just had to lure him into the bedroom so I could take the list of his negative qualities off the fridge so he wouldn't see.
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
These 27 Hilarious People Wrote Their Own Obituaries
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
23 Men Confess What Gifts Would Brighten Their Day
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂