i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I just googled if crying burns calories
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude