you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
