i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We mailed him an 18 inch double headed dildo for his birthday. The Fedex guys certainly got a laugh out of it.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
I ended up snorting coke while wearing a Bavarian dress and I feel like I need to reevaluate my life
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
My dog just blew me a kiss. First of all I'm stoned and second of all he's a pitbull. Those aren't sexual dogs. So wtf.
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