never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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