I'm really into asian looking animals
Did he leave or is he still there?
He left right away, I might have passed out. I saw your text and was like who left where? Then the oh shit feeling sunk in, hangover starting now.
After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
Randomize