dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every concussion has its silver lining
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Randomize