sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
i just picked a peanut m&m up off the floor. with my toes. and then proceeded to eat it.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Now all I want to do is stay up, drink wine, and look at dragons.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
