you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize