you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
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