so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
I'm taking a new approach to homewrecking... for science. Or I totally would. I have to see what happens between my ex & his brother when he finds out.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
Apparently stumbling across interstate bridges is not cause for concern but screaming Wookie noises at cars is. Thanks, cops.
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
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