i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize