sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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