If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
Randomize