That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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