I fucking hate vegan toaster pastries. You don't fuck with poptarts. It's like baseball...it's the backbone of american sport and you don't change it. Poptarts are the backbone of american fatasses and you don't just go changing them.
Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
