I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
so this chick screams out the name doug is bed..not to later do i find out doug is her vibrator
hello competition
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
She started throwing ice at me and started yelling, "Holy water bitches! This is an exorcism!"
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
