I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Woke up handcuffed to a half gallon of beam. Yep. This is my life.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize