I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
While you were puking in the ocean I was rubbing your back saying "Just give it back to Mother Earth".
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Also, I threw up on the playground again. I've honestly had more fun there this past summer than I did in my entire childhood.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
