I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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