What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Randomize
