He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
My day in three words: secret purse cake
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
you told me I was being patronizing because I didn't want you to run barefoot across a construction site
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
Randomize