I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
He is completely naked, curled in a ball, and rocking back and forth in the shower humming lullabies to himself. This is your responsibility since I'm going to be fucking someone in 5.7 seconds.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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