i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
A conundrum I think only you would understand: how to classily post "I need a ride to the liquor store" on one's Facebook wall?
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
do nipples grow back?
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
