she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I've forgotten how to blink. Help plz?
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
well my apartment and my life are still a disaster but I did clean off my desk so that's gotta count for something...
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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