Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
He said his parents were apparently coming over to surprise him with breakfast and I’ve never gotten dressed and run out of the door that quickly. I have commitment issues.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
Like Napoleon Dynamite?
Exactly like Napoleon Dynamite
But with bacon.
I refuse to shit my pants for anyone except Cher and Christina Aguilera!
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