he puts the penis in happiness.
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
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