i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
The empty keg landed on my head. It's a good thing we already got shitfaced or i'd be a vegetable and the humor would be completely lost.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
if you do the accent, i'll wear the eyepatch
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
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