Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
That unicorn pillow pet really made sleeping with my head in the toilet a little better.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
