butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
This is the high leading the old right now
Guys, Black Friday does not exist in the world of dealing. Stop texting me asking what my deals are.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
i was asked to be gay of honor by three different girls and NONE of the groomsmen at any of the weddings is open to experimenting. i mean whats the point then.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
Randomize
