Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
