jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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