so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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