Remember that time I came into your room after taking a muscle relaxant and we argued about what state has the longest coastline?
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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