got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
