I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize
