lets start a swedish sibling band together
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Shit day. Some kids decided to open my car at 3 AM while I was at work and the alarm went off. I went after them with a sword but they were minors so I didn't kill them.
Randomize
