everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?
lets deal with that after we figure out where i am
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
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