hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Randomize
