Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Randomize
